September 13th, 2011 (just now posted here)
September 2nd, 2011 is the day he abducted me, the 3rd he let me go. The reality of what all he did to me is crashing in on me. I feel like I'm broken. When I first chose my screen name in the few support forums I have joined I didn't mean (Jaime*Is*Broken) as in my spirit was broken. I originally meant it because my arm is broken. He broke it when he had me in his van. Now I feel like I do mean my spirit or mind.
The truth of what happened has crashed in on me and i don't want this truth.
I was looking through pictures of mom and I just started to cry. Mom died in a car accident last year and I really need her right now. Dad came in my room and tried to hug me, hold me. and tell me it will be okay and I snapped at him. I told him not to touch me. I feel like a bad daughter. He just wanted to show me he cared and I keep pushing him away. I can't even explain to him why I am pushing him away because I don't understand why.
My head, arm, wrists, guts, and back hurts. The physical pain won't even go away. I won't take pain meds. I have an aunt who is an addict and I'm not going down that path. My aunt somewhat has it under control but she does struggle with it.
I know dad. I love you too.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry for all of this and for your mom. You probably don't know this I mean how could you but my dad died in a car accident when I was a little kid. The guy you met at the hospital is my moms husband a step dad I guess. Im sorry he broke your arm did he beat up on you or was you two dating. No man should treat a girl like that. Thats relly mean of him. what injuries did he give you? You said your guts and wrists and back and stuff was hurting. Is that how you got the scar over your eyes. I'm sorry for asking so many questions.
ReplyDeleteThank you and you are right no one should treat another person like that. The rest of your questions will be answered by continuing to read. Yes, that's where I got the scar from, thanks for noticing. I have been so worried that no one would notice my scar. Do you since the sarcasm.
ReplyDeleteJust from rereading the few posts I have so far, I can tell a difference in your writing. I haven't pinpointed exactly what yet, but I do know that you have been revealing more emotionally in your more recent posts. I am proud of you for working so hard. Whenever you are ready to reveal more, we are here to listen. (((((Jaime)))))
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