Yesterday (September 15th, 2011) was the day I was suppose to gain my independence through the freedom of a drivers licence. I made the appointment to take my driving test about a month ago. Two weeks ago my life changed because of the selfish actions of a pretend man. After he hurt me I forgot all about my pending driving test until Monday or Tuesday this week. I wasn't for sure if I was emotionally stable enough to get behind the wheel. Quite frankly I'm still not sure. Still I had a fairly good night Wednesday after I chatted with a friend and expressed a fairly high level of anger toward my attacker. I felt okay enough to take the driving test Thursday afternoon.
Dad and I drove to the DMV and as I walked up to the counter so that I could let them know I was there to take my driving test I was told that I couldn't. It turns out that they won't let a person with a broken arm take the test. Their reasoning was because my left arm is immobilized with my elbow at a 90 degree angle because of the cast, I can't safely operate a motor vehicle. Okay, okay, I will have to reluctantly agree with them. I can imagine that using the turning signal and keeping my hands on 10 O-Clock and 2 O-Clock with a broken and immobilized arm would be sort of IMPOSSIBLE. Uhhhhhh. I'm still a little aggravated.
Well atleast you got your drivers licence since then but I hated waiting to take the test when I got muin.
ReplyDeleteJaime, you mentioned that you spoke to a friend on the phone and expressed a lot of anger towards your attacker. Are you still able to express this type of anger towards him? And, if so, are you able to speak with your friends about it? Or, do you mainly stay silent during the day, and is it as though no one mentions it anymore? Also, I'm wondering - do you have anyone at your new school that you feel comfortable talking to? Sorry so many questions. Please don't feel obligated to answer all these! Sorry they wouldn't let you take the test, but I am glad that you have it now! (((((Jaime)))))
ReplyDeleteI was in CHAT with this person, a fellow survivor. I am able to think of this anger but not really able to express it. I have tried several times to express it.
ReplyDeleteI have tried to talk to my friends about it but I can tell they don't really get it. Thus I avoid talking to them out of fear they will say something stupid..
No one at my new school knows anything about this.
Ah, gotcha, "chat". I missed that earlier.
ReplyDeleteI can understand not wanting to talk about it with others out of fear they will say something stupid. I'm sorry - I wish that you had someone you could talk to. Even if they can't understand (which luckily they don't), it's too bad they can't find ways to show their support. That must be really tough.
Would you prefer that someone at your new school know? Or, is it a nice break being in a place where no one knows?
It's a nice break, but kinda lonely if that makes sense.
ReplyDeleteThat makes complete sense. (((Jaime)))
ReplyDeleteYeah, I did and I like having it but I am too afraid to go anywhere. See how messed up I am, you don't want to go out on a date with a weird person.
ReplyDelete