Part 9 - What Happened To Me - (Question - What was the worse thing he did to you?)

This is a part of my story of what happened to me that I have kept pushing off further and further. I'm not sure if I had been pushing it off in an attempt to avoid it or if it was because I thought I had a lifetime to address it. Either way it feels like I might be running out of time, but then again we are all running out of time I guess.

Back in December 2011 my therapist gave me a list of questions that I could answer and give back to her or keep to myself. I answered these questions then posted them on my blog in a post entitled "A Self Interview" and gave the answers to my therapist.

At the time I did this self interview there was one question I couldn't yet answer and I am ready to answer that question. Here is the question.

When It Rains, It Pours

Years ago when I was just a child I heard the phrase, "When it rains, it pours". I guess that is accurate and my life grants evidentiary credence to that assumed truity of life. Nearly three years ago my dad's, little sister's and my world seemed to shatter into a million pieces when my mom died in a car accident while our family was on our way home from a family get together. A year and a half after that I was taken against my will by a selfish person whom chose self gratification over human decency. I became pregnant as a result of his depravity and in the last few days of finalizing my decision on an adoptive family for that innocent life within me, I ended up miscarrying while sitting in my 10th grade algebra II class. Now, a mere sixteen months after my miscarriage I have found out via a labyrinth of tests that I have GBM which is a rather aggressive form of brain tumors that will likely kill me within eighteen months even with treatment.

Sometimes I feel like God has chosen me to suffer.